


Introduction

by ShieldMaidenFics



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, One Shot, POV Third Person, Support Group, stress habits
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-20
Updated: 2020-04-20
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:35:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23754712
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShieldMaidenFics/pseuds/ShieldMaidenFics
Summary: It is never easy to admit who you are when you know that you have walked down the wrong path. Yet a smile from someone who you feel understands can make it a little easier and not so scary.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	Introduction

His hands were fidgety to such a point he thought there would be no way to calm them down. He was tugging hard on his long sleeved sweater, searching for more lose treads that he could pull out or twirl with his fingers. Twirl them to a point they got so tight it would hurt. He just needed one more lose tread, then he would be able to calm his hands down enough. Just one more…

His attention was on the room; the people in the room. Some were standing by the snack table, others were talking to one another here and there, seeming to know each other. He wondered which one was the counselor. The person he was supposed to find, since this was his first day here.  
He had made sure to find the exact right place, not wishing to expose himself to the wrong people. Not that anyone was likely to know him, he was after all new to this city. But still. He could not let too many know of his secret if he wanted to live a normal life here.

Still looking around, a few of the people by the snack table started to glance his way. Though none of them approached him.  
Rather, they stood there and whispered to each other… what was this? High school?

Lukas felt a little annoyed where he stood alone. He really wish that Abel had come with him, had been allowed to come with him. But these meetings were supposed to be anonymous, which Lukas was glad for, since that was what he wished. However, standing here alone and being whispered about was not what he wanted. He had been through that enough in his home town.

He check his phone to see what time it was. And if the e-mail he had gotten about where to meet at what time was correct. The meeting should have started by now he noted.

He pocketed his phone, and resumed tugging on his blue sweater.

As he stood there alone started more people, as time went by, to look towards him. Some also stared or at the door beside him. Lukas hated being a center of attention and did not meet anyones gaze as they looked his way. He rather keep his attention on the floor, and hoped that the stupid counselor would come already so that he could be done here, and then leave.

As if his thoughts had been read did the door open, and a man came inside the room. He wore a look of concern as he passed Lukas, not seeming to noticing him. He started counting the people in the room, but not becoming happy with the number he got. Lukas could practically see the rainclouds that formed over the man’s head as he seemed to get even more and more concerned as he counted again and again. Though he never noticed Lukas.

Lukas, taking a stab in the dark, assumed that the man was looking for him. Though he could not see how he would be able to approach or talk to such a gloomy man. But then again, he did not have to come back if he did not like being here. He had been promised that by Abel.

Coming behind the man did Lukas intend to tap him on the shoulder, but as he saw his sleeve get dragged up did he retract his hand. He settled on announcing his presence by a small cough.

Now usually when he does this, or when he has seen other do this does he knows that the person might get a little startled. However, to get so startled that they scream and jump 5 feet away from you, was not something he had expected or assumed would happened.

Lukas not knowing what really to do, or how to respond to the man getting so scared, could he do nothing else but to treat this situation like if he had accidentally steeped on a dog’s tail. He put his arms up in a none threatening fashion, and took a few steps back.  
The others in the room seemed to have found this all quite funny and were either laughing or trying to suppress it. Lukas wished that he could give them all ugly stares, but he first had to see if the man he had startled had become angry with him.

The man seemed to have finally found his bearings again after most of the laughter had died down. He turned around and meet Lukas’s eyes, and Lukas instinctively turned away. Though from the corner of his eyes could it seem like something dawned on the man.

“Oh my gosh! I’m so sorry Lukas. I didn’t mean o jump away from you like that, and how did I not see you there? I was outside looking for you and I was so afraid that you had gotten lost. But I thought that maybe you found your way inside, but I did not see you inside here. But you must have been because suddenly you were behind me and that scared me a lot. And you know I have a friend like that who disappear a lot too, maybe you are related, though I know he has a twin and he is easy to see form a mile’s distance.” And the man just continued to ramble about these twins Mathew and Alfred, and if Lukas was related to them and that he was sorry for having gotten so scared. And he seemed like he would never stop unless someone intervened, though no one did.

“It’s okay,” Lukas answered finally, when he just could not take the rambling any more.

“I just realized, you might not even have been Lukas, I’m so sorry for just having assumed and I did not tell you my name either, I forgot to do that in the mail I just told you to come and look for me and.” He started to ramble again.

“That’s also okay,” Lukas answered. He approached the man and stood in front of him, noticing that he was a few inches taller than him.  
“I’m Lukas, so it is all okay,” he said and hoped that it looked like he was smiling in a friendly manner.

This guy was weird, but also kind of funny. Though Lukas had a hard time seeing how he could be the counselor, sure he was talkative, but it was more rambling honestly. And he had also yet to smile or even look happy. Lukas had at least tried to show emotions something he had been told he did not do so well.

“Oh, okay,” he seemed to breath out in relief. “I’m Tino, the counselor for this group, I’m glad to have you on board,” he smiled and reached out his hand. Lukas swore suddenly that the sun had come directly out to greet him.

Lukas looked at the hand, but did not shake it. “Isn’t the meeting starting a little late now?” he asked and gave the other people - who had not seemed to mind the small show- a quick look.

“Oh!” it seemed like Tino had just realized that they were more than two people in the room. Lukas was almost afraid that Tino would get that depressed look over him again.

“Everyone,” he said as he clapped his hands together “Go and find something to drink or eat from the snack table now and then come to the circle, we’ll start as soon as everyone are seated.” Tino said as he smiled brightly. Where the rain cloud had hung were now only warm, nice, sunshine. Then he looked at Lukas, and he had such a nice smile on his face directed only at him, that Lukas felt that he would almost blush.  
“If it’s okay, I would like to just talk to you a little bit before we start.”

He nodded to Tino and he was lead a few feet away from the group. Close enough so that everyone knew where he was but far enough so that they would not hear.

“Okay, so. What we usually do is start with a name round. It is not expected that you remember every single one, if you are unsure of a name then it is okay to ask.” He started to say as he looked towards the people. “I usually ask if anyone has something they want to share with the group at the beginning, and at the end, and that can be anything. You don’t have to share anything if you don’t wish to,” he said further and looked back at Lukas and smiled.  
“The only thing I’m expecting of you and everyone else is that you are attentive of each other, respect each other and are honest about your feelings and what you all think,” he finished with a smile, looking towards the circle again and saw that they were the only once who were missing.

They both walked to the circle, which was just a bunch of chairs form in a circle so that it would be easier for everyone to see each other. Lukas felt his heart hammer in his chest and he felt the need to tug on his sweater again.  
Maybe this had been a bad idea after all. Why he had let Able convince him to do this was beyond him now. The layout of what they did here was okay enough, it sounded nice actually expect for one thing. One small thing. He had to say his name to everyone here.

He was not sure why it was that he did not like for everyone to know who he was. It was just how it had always been for him since this all started. Often when people knew who he was and what he was did they start saying his name with this form of disgust and anger in their voice. Like if he had done them something wrong. The only one who he had hurt was himself, so no one else had the right to be angry with him.

He seated himself beside Tino, hoping that it meant that he would have to go last. Again it seemed like Tino knew what he needed and said that they would start going from his right. And since Lukas was to Tino’s left did it mean that he would be last.

The first person to get up was a woman who had been by the snack table and had also been whispering to the man to her right when Lukas had stood there and not known if he had come to the right place. And he knew that he was already breaking one of Tino’s rules by not listening, but his heart was going so fast he could feel the pulse in his ear. Suddenly they were halfway already and he was not ready to do this.  
It was irrational he knew, everyone here was like him, struggled like him, and yet he did not want to admit it to these people or anyone else. And for some reason he did not want to admit such and ugly truth in front of Tino who was the embodiment of sunshine. For each person who said their name did he smile so brightly to them and said either “hello” “Welcome back” or “nice to see you again”. Would he smile like that for him too?

There were only three people left before Lukas had to go and he thought about just bolting for the door, faking sickness or just maybe faint out of his chair. All of those options sounded better than having to go through with this.

He tugged on his sweater, digging his nail into the fabric. And he did not know how he had not noticed it before but he could felt on lose thread in his sweater. He started to tug on it and twirl it around his pinky getting it as tight as he could. He looked at Tino, and Tino looked at him and nodded. It was his turn now.

Lukas stood up holding his gaze down. He felt bad now to know that everyone else had kept attention, except for him. He did not know anyones name here, except for Tino’s and his own. He really wished that he had dared to approach the snack table so that he would have had something to drink. His throat felt dry and scratchy, like if he would talk now he would sound like he was in his puberty.

He steadied himself, took a breath of air and concentrated on the few word he would have to speak. He also reminded himself that if he did not like to be here, than he was allowed to only come here today and then would not have to show up again. None of the people here would know who he truly was, it was unlikely that he would meet any of them or that they would remember him.

With that in mind was his heart and mind eased a little.

“Hello. My name is Lukas, and… I’m a drug addict.” He looks towards Tino and his approval that he did decent.

“Hello Lukas, and welcome to us,” Tino says and smiles cheerfully.

Lukas hated introductions, from when he became an addict to even now, and he would probably never like them again. Yet, right now, today, it was not so bad. Because a man named Tino smiled to him in a way that told him that it was okay. That he was not human scum for his fault and flaws.

**Author's Note:**

> Just a small fic I found hidden in my files and I thought, this was not really bad, and I wanted to post it. It was originally written sometiems in 2017. So a little late. Also it was supposed to be a part of a 100 prompt thingy. I do not think that will be finished. 
> 
> Have a nice day!


End file.
